Here’s an important fact about family safety, especially family travel safety, we all need to keep in mind:
When you make the plan, sitting comfortably at home at the table with a beverage nearby, safe and warm, you are smarter than you implementing the plan in the field.
Think about the last time you were in full family vacation mode. You were tired. You were a little confused. The kids had been clamoring for attention/trying to get themselves killed/asking for money for a few hours. You were probably dehydrated. You might have had your “dad goggles” on, where you focus on a short term goal even though nothing but that desire suggests it’s really all that important.
There’s no real replacement for information on the ground, and sometimes we find the reality of a situation is so different from what we thought it would be that we have to change the plan. Most of the time, though, if we did our planning well, that’s not the case.
This is especially important when things start to go wrong, because travelling parents often end up in the following cycle:
Step One: Start with a plan for the day/afternoon/location
Step Two: Things start out all right
Step Three: A small thing goes wrong
Step Four: That small thing begins to cascade into either multiple small things or a big thing
Step Five: Because we’ve already mentally committed to the plan, we keep moving forward instead of stopping to reasses
Step Six: At best, we all have less of a good time than we could have. At worst, somebody gets hurt.
In my interview with travel safety coach Dr. Andrea Leschak, she talked about one of her own experiences on a scuba expedition, and how her life was endangered because she didn’t pull the plug when she should have. She was travelling without kids, doing something she’s an expert at, so she was able to get out of it intact, but it illustrates the point: the importance of a No-Go Line.
No-Go Line Basics
A no-go line is exactly what it sounds like. Before you set off, either at home prior to leaving or in the morning before the day’s events, you think deeply about the activity you’re going to do. Look for places things could get sketchy. Based on that thought (and any research you need to do), you set up an “If A, then B” statement, where B is always either aborting or significantly changing your plan.
For example:
Going on a desert hike, “If we get to less than a pint of water each, we turn around and go back.”
Swimming at the beach, “If the tide gets above that line of rocks, we pack it in and go home.”
Going dancing while visiting a town you don’t know well, “If we see more than one young man drunk, we go home immediately".”
Visiting an amusement park in the middle of summer, “If anybody looks dehydrated, we find shade and rest for half an hour.”
You get the idea. A no-go line helps you set the rules for your trip while you’re still in your right mind.
The Problem With a No-Go Line
No-go lines are an excellent tool for family travel safety, but they have one serious flaw. They only work if you respect them.
Take the desert hike example from above. When you reach that point where your group has less than a pint of water each, it will be tempting to say “But it’s only another two miles! We’ve got this!” But remember in that situation that your planning self was smarter than your executing self. Trust your no-go line and respect it.
This is a simple concept to understand, and easy enough to practice at the planning stages. It’s harder to implement in the moment, but hey…we’re parents. We had to turn in our “do stupid things” license the moment our first baby met the world.
If you haven’t yet, take some time to watch my full interview with Andrea. The no-go line was just one of many really great ideas she had for us.